Need advice on next step

[McGavockRaider]

I was never the type to throw my feelings on the net.. Nor did i think anyone should... But,

So My girlfriend of 5 years calls me up on the 21st of august, and says that shes not happy anymore, and needs some time to decide if she wants to be with me...

Then last wednesday I get a call from her and its over. he decided that shes happier without me... But see I admit I was a dick during the last year of our relationship, treating her like shit, ect.. The reason was because I felt our relationship was "bullet-proof". Apparently it wasnt. Back on topic... We are both young, im 18 shes 17. she we have been together our whole teenage years..

Anyways, during the time we were together shes had my Class Ring($450) well when we broke up I been trying tio get it back, and I wont be able to get it at anytime after tomorrow for like a week... so I was goign to get it today, but she was ignoring my calls, and txt... And I just snapped, and her aunt answered the phone and was like I needed to grow up and grow some balls and all this shit, and leave her along and b4 i could get out that all I wanted to know was where my stuff was because she said she was going to give it to her aunt so i wouldnt have to drive as far to get them...(45 min drive) to her house, she hung up the phone. Anyways, after all that I stopped calling her for a while and when I tried back her cellphone has been disconnected. I mean I never ment for that to happen, because in the future I wanna try to get back with her... But Iknow shes at home, they have "family get togethers" on holidays like this. And I called her homephone and her grandma said she wasnt there. I know shes there.

But I found this song that pretty much tell exactly how I feel, and tells our relationship... And I was going to write her a letter and make a cd with all of "our songs" and with this song. Then send it in the mail to her... I mean I dont think our "relationship" could get anyworse. But I wanna know what othe rppl think before I do this... But she does have a new boyfriend. They started going out 2 days after we broke up.. im thinking thatmaybe this could "bring her back to me" b4 they get too "together". nah mean?

Please, please if me and you have beef please keep it outta here... Just need some advice...

[sizzle305]

if you were together for that long... and she started with the other dude only 2 days after you two breaking up..that relationship had been over in her eyes before it was official... give her space.. dont keep calling and stressing her. youll look like a pest imo just do your thing or w.e respect her space for now and if she comes back to you for any reason then let her know that you not tryin to be bout the same bullshit or w.e.. i wouldnt hang my hopes on someone whos ignoring me and w.e though could end up fucking yourself up when the outcome isnt what you want... but thass only what i think.. *walks off*

[McGavockRaider]

if you were together for that long... and she started with the other dude only 2 days after you two breaking up..that relationship had been over in her eyes before it was official... give her space.. dont keep calling and stressing her. youll look like a pest imo just do your thing or w.e respect her space for now and if she comes back to you for any reason then let her know that you not tryin to be bout the same bullshit or w.e.. i wouldnt hang my hopes on someone whos ignoring me and w.e though could end up fucking yourself up when the outcome isnt what you want... but thass only what i think.. *walks off*
Yeah I see what you mean about ti being over already, but I did treat her like shit and maybe she just lost it... and she the type who has to be with someone so that sped up the process of them getting together..

And about her ignoring, noone in her family likes me...

So maybe they were putting things in her head...

like dont answer... blah, blah

But I think if she sits in her room and lreads and listens then maybe she can make a decison by herself

[Craven_MooreHead]

ima get back to you on this one homie....gotta think about it. I've been in a similar situation

[McGavockRaider]

^^ aiight man...

[sizzle305]

Yeah I see what you mean about ti being over already, but I did treat her like shit and maybe she just lost it... and she the type who has to be with someone so that sped up the process of them getting together..

And about her ignoring, noone in her family likes me...

So maybe they were putting things in her head...

like dont answer... blah, blah

But I think if she sits in her room and lreads and listens then maybe she can make a decison by herself

if you two were together for that long... she shouldnt have to read or listen to anything to know whats really good she should have her own memories and whatnot that would guide her back to you if its the right thing to do...

[..:PrOdiGy:..]

if you were together for that long... and she started with the other dude only 2 days after you two breaking up..that relationship had been over in her eyes before it was official

^^REAL SHIT. Ain't no way she just breaks up with you after that LONG and jus of a sudden get a new dude. They must have been talkin serious when ya'll were still together or maybe she was even cheating on you but idk. Damn thats fucked she didn't waste any time moving on :smh:. You should jus give her space and leave her alone but if you just that serious about getting your ring back then you jus need to drive to her house and confront her yourself cus she's not going to answer your phone calls obviously. But at the same time you were wrong for treating her like that and just expect for her to take it and ignore that shit. All girls have feelings and when you treat them wrong theyre going to get back at you eventually. It's jus now she's doing it and youre feeling sad and thats the turn-around of it.

[McGavockRaider]

if you two were together for that long... she shouldnt have to read or listen to anything to know whats really good she should have her own memories and whatnot that would guide her back to you if its the right thing to do...
didnt think of that...

[McGavockRaider]

^^REAL SHIT. Ain't no way she just breaks up with you after that LONG and jus of a sudden get a new dude. They must have been talkin serious when ya'll were still together or maybe she was even cheating on you but idk. Damn thats fucked she didn't waste any time moving on :smh:. You should jus give her space and leave her alone but if you just that serious about getting your ring back then you jus need to drive to her house and confront her yourself cus she's not going to answer your phone calls obviously. But at the same time you were wrong for treating her like that and just expect for her to take it and ignore that shit. All girls have feelings and when you treat them wrong theyre going to get back at you eventually. It's jus now she's doing it and youre feeling sad and thats the turn-around of it.

Kinda like Whats goes around-comes-around...

[sizzle305]

just give her some time... shes gon miss you in a second.. and when you talk to her dont overdo it but let her know whats good ... if she sees that you care and decides to come back thass wassup if she thinks shes better off without then dont sit on it...

[McGavockRaider]

just give her some time... shes gon miss you in a second.. and when you talk to her dont overdo it but let her know whats good ... if she sees that you care and decides to come back thass wassup if she thinks shes better off without then dont sit on it...

Yeah I just dont want her to get too attatched, and not know what couldve been with us

[sizzle305]

if she has true feelings for you then she wouldnt be able to get attached to someone whom she hasnt been with for any time at all... itll all play out in time..

[LRM]

The hardest thing is letting a girl you are in love with make her own decisions, and thats what you have to do. You give her distance, force yourself to see whats out there. Don't wait for her to change her mind, because that will be going down a self-destructive path. Tell yourself and believe that shes making a big mistake even if you fucked up on most occassions. These acts of desperation would only do so much as prove to her that you are crazy. Instead of trying to keep her in your midst in the hope of a reunion in the future, just move on with your life- what makes you think she'll trust you this time around. Believe it or not she will respect you the most for being decent about it, not making a big deal of it and seeing you do what you know is right - moving on.

You're in this predicament because of 5 years of being smothered - you're both young, naive and when it gets bad and the newness wears off, cheaters cheat. The only problem is that she didn't want to tell you. But since she didn't want to appear to be the bad one in this mess and didn't want to get to be in a confrontation and feel guilty afterwards, she choose a different tactic- total cut off. Isnt it strange how people are one person one day and different the next? This tactic involved slowly letting you know through hints and bad behaviour that she is turning the tables around. Eventually she would hope that you will get so mad and won't tolerate her new behaviour that it will be you who ends up leaving first. Shit it didnt work. Well not yet that is. you get the message?

right now, I wouldn't be conerened about women if I were you. you were in a relationship so long you neglected yourself and your game. 5 years is relative good years - just see it as it is and learn from it. You're young and you have your freedom.

[mt3130]

imo...get your stuff and move on. you treated her bad, she is with someone else. theres other girls to sweat.

[jdizzy86]

Isnt it strange how people are one person one day and different the next?


real talk. i had a girl do this same thing to me about 3 years ago. we were together for a minute, shit's perfect. fight a little bit, but not that bad. course i get to thinkin we been together for awhile and nothing gonna change that. do whatever i want type of stuff. na..didn't happen. left me, got with a new guy less than 2 or 3 days later. lot of stuff happend in that week...almost caught a charge(guy dropped 'em) and i ended being the asshole cuz i wasn't patient.


my point is to be patient. let things play out how they will. after all that bs...three months later i met my girl that i have now...10x better than the one before. i don't deserve her and i know it, and i'm thankful for her every day..hell i even thanked my ex for breaking up with me lol.

[McGavockRaider]

Yeah I just got a call from her telling me where I have to go to pick up my stuff tomorrow...

She seemed very upset with the "stunt" I pulled tonight, so I think ive came to the decision not to do anything ATM...

[Kamy]

u get a nutral freind that both u guys kno to get it bak for u
and dont try to do anything stupid
and if she doesnt want to get bak together leave her alone

[Br0ward^954^K0untie]

aight yo......im kinda agreein with what everyone else sayin.....but ima go a different route......

Im sure yall got mutual friends.....if she got another dude so quick she was either cheatin or she tryin to make you feel like shit.....Id say get another chick and c what happens....don't advertise that shit but eventually she will hear about it....might open her eyez.....and if not shit at least u got a "rebound".....:sweatdrop

[McGavockRaider]

aight yo......im kinda agreein with what everyone else sayin.....but ima go a different route......

Im sure yall got mutual friends.....if she got another dude so quick she was either cheatin or she tryin to make you feel like shit.....Id say get another chick and c what happens....don't advertise that shit but eventually she will hear about it....might open her eyez.....and if not shit at least u got a "rebound".....:sweatdrop

I wasnt looking for a new chick, but there are some that wanted to get with me, but I was with her, so I guess imma try to get with them and see whats up

[Lunatik]

Its tough because i know both of you got feelings still cuz after 5 years you cant help but have feelins ya know. She may be needing sometime to see whats out there and u should let her explore, cuz if you dont and if you guys do get married she will have regrets. my boy has a sayin "let em go but dont let em get away" meanin let her do her thing but dont do anythin to totally damage the friendship/relationship. sometimes you gotta open the cage and test if the bird goin to fly away on you. either way you cant help it ya know? makin a CD is a good idea but u also dont wanna be up in her space cuz that'll jus make you look bad. i know shits rough homie good luck wit it man.



PS. sorry for the long reply

[McGavockRaider]

Yeah see she lives 45 mins away so Im figuring shes starting her senior yr and she juts needs bf to be there.. I can only be there on sundays since I got a 40 hr a week job and shit

[stillogic]

Damn man i feel your pain. same with my babymoms. me and her was together for 2 yrs her fams hated me and everything but wen we broke up i was only der for my daughter. i gaver her space left her alone aint ask her nothing a couple months later she calls me up @ work. home. tries to talk to me. and now me and her rents are cool. lil by lil were tryna work back at in a small way. she still doing her and i'm not phazed by it. you just gotta give it a rest for a while i understand your hurt homie i know that feelings. but give the break it deserves all good things must come to and end to continue ma dude. hopefully ya 2 work things out if not trust me man the right one will find you no matter if you love her.

[McGavockRaider]

29,400 post!!!

Anyways I went and got my shit today