"Breaks" in relationships

[Collegeparkss]

How do yall feel bout breaks or timeouts in relationships?

My gurl used to stay "i wanna see if i can live without u" or "i need some time to myself" when she go through some shyt. When she say she wanna see if she can live without me, i take dat shyt as disrespect cuz u wit me NOW muh fuka, y u wanna see if u can do without me. dats like she wanna prepare for life after me but at tha same time she be talkin bout she wanna marry me and have my kids and shyt. i mean i aint no sorry azz nigga, i spoil her, treat her azz right, even helpin her get into college so im lookin at it like she dumb as fuk if she wanna see if she can do without a good azz nigga dat care bout her azz. i told her i aint gon sit round like no duck azz nigga while she figure dat shyt out. i kno most of yall gon be like she playin me or got a nigga on tha side but i kno dat aint tha case 100%. i feel like if she is goin through some shyt, dat should make her come closer to me, but she push EVERYBODY away when some bullshyt happen to her.

throw ya boi some input !!

[viciuzurban]

mann if yo girl is playing guessing games like that then it aint for real sure relationships breaks are fine for cooling off periods but you dont shut down the communication sometimes shit can work in your favour maybe time apart will draw you to closer together make you stronger make you realise wut u got

othertimes those situations mean that person has cheated or is thinking about cheating you need to watch over your girl making sure she aint doin ane freaky shiit behind your back

[beautiful_dyme]

frist off,why the hell would she wanna see if she can live wit out u.if she can,she can.fuck,gurls piss me off wit that shit,if a dude treats u rite,go wit it.but i understand y she pushes ppl away when she's angry.when something happens 2 me i'm used 2 keeping things 2 myself,n dealing wit a situation lyke in a quiet room by myself.now that i'm in a realtionship,i have 2 try 2 open up n shyt but it's probaby the hardest thing 2 do 4 me.but don't get angry at her pushing u away when something happens,but be angry at her wanting space from u just so u can sit around 4 nuthin.

[streets]

agrees with vic..

will say tho, sometimes people do need space. some people do not involve others when they have problems. Especially if they had been like that before they met you. Its not easy to change habits.

I know it feel like, "why don't she talk to me", but if she need space give her space. my ladys like that.was kinda confusing at first, but she comes out of it communicates when she ready. tryin to force her to talk is just bad news. she may or may not change, but thats how she is. don't think she cheatin or nothin, but its how she is.

so, good luck in figuring out what its really about. maybe u get lucky and she just needed space like she said and it will all be good.

[streets]

oh, and :smh: to the seeing if she can live without u. I'd probably be like "wtf is that supposed to mean"?

[InYourDreams]

I dont understand this...when im goin through shit is when i need my man the most

[Collegeparkss]

man u seem just like her azz. she be talkin bout its hard for her to open up and trust 100% cuz of tha bullshyt niggas in tha past. but i was just gettin opinions cuz i neva understood dat shyt. to me space leaves time and opportunity for somebody to take ya place cuz by tha time u realize wha u have and try to come back to tha shyt, its goin to be gone and u gon be left wit tha dick face.

but its like im at school durin the week and come chill wit her on friday, saturday, and sunday. we talk on tha phone everyday but i still feel like dats a big enough break if she wanted one. aint like im crowdin her, at her crib 24/7. hit ya boi back wit some mo input

[streets]

I dont understand this...when im goin through shit is when i need my man the most
okay. third post, but to me needing somebody and being able to adjust to someone being there when no one was before may not be easy. I dunno, but its my rationale. I do agree with you tho, thats the time when you want to lean on someone. but, what do I know.

[Collegeparkss]

i mean i guess cuz of wha tha niggas b4 done told her like 'ima be here forever, ima do this and that, it got her like when this nigga gon fuk ova my azz. but yea she tha type where when she get mad she tell me bout it when she ready, i used to try to force her azz but dat shyt almost blew up in my face. i done felt plenty time like i needed a break from her azz but i was like naw cuz i dont want it to be like everytime somethin pop up, a nigga need a break. dats how i feel, if she take a break when somethin happen, everytime somethin happen after dat then she gon want a break. i aint no toy so i closed shop on dat shyt.

[streets]

man u seem just like her azz. she be talkin bout its hard for her to open up and trust 100% cuz of tha bullshyt niggas in tha past. but i was just gettin opinions cuz i neva understood dat shyt. to me space leaves time and opportunity for somebody to take ya place cuz by tha time u realize wha u have and try to come back to tha shyt, its goin to be gone and u gon be left wit tha dick face.

but its like im at school durin the week and come chill wit her on friday, saturday, and sunday. we talk on tha phone everyday but i still feel like dats a big enough break if she wanted one. aint like im crowdin her, at her crib 24/7. hit ya boi back wit some mo input
I am in a place where if people want space I give them space. I cares for her, but at some point either the situation change, or my response to it does. I deal with things only as long as I can. At that time, I say I gotta problem. Either she address it, or she don't. If she don't, well, I gotta another decision to make. I know my limits, and I play it by ear. it works now and it will as long I can deal.

don't know if that helps.

[snownsurfchic]

you sound like u really love ure girl and she sounds like i am with my man, when shit gets hard id rather just run away then deal with all the stress sometimes, but all you can do is either do what u gotta do to keep her there or let her go and pray that she comes back to you. heres a cute idea though to try and keep her there, take it or leave it, just tryin to help one of the good guys that are still out there out a lil bit. i'll use roses but u can choose whatever flower she'll like, buy a dozen roses, and then buy one fake rose, take one real rose out and put the fake one in the vase with the remaining 11 roses, try to get it to match the roses you already got, then give them to her and tell her you'll love her til the last one dies... its worth a shot, and we go for it : ) good luck, i wish the best for the both of you

[viciuzurban]

'timeout' is the word you give to a four year old thats been messin around


if yo think your s/o is a baby about the situation and not man enough or able enough to be committed to the relationship then you are walking a tightrope. i fukin hate that wen chicks run off with another nig. hoping for better and then get treated like shiit and come back running to me with open arms. its not like i didnt tell you so aye. :smh:

[viciuzurban]

sometimes the bet way to tackle a bad relationship is head-on....ask her wuts not working and she can do the same to you you need to open up the discussion not fucking shut it down thasts y u got so many nigs. confused. many left without an explanation.

[streets]

yeah. i agree vic..

I would say she just might be like snownsurfchic, or she might really be tryin to say that there is a problem that shes not addressing. I would say he needs more clarification from her as to where shes at. my lady basically says "its not you, its got nuthin to do wit you". all i can do is take her on her word and keep it movin.

now if someday she like, it is you and has alsways been you, i'd be like wtf???

ya know

[z.Designs]

I dont understand this...when im goin through shit is when i need my man the most
that sounds the most realistic

[Collegeparkss]

we been workin on this situation i just wanted some input from some outside sources. basically she is like snownsurfchic, when shyt gets hard she rather run from tha shyt or ball up but i explained to her azz that this aint no middle school relationship where all u got to worry bout is passing ya gurl a note everyday. i be tellin her azz that all tha shyt we been through and talk bout is grown folks business, not no lil kid shyt. and when one person in tha relationship got a problem then both of them do. so when her mama be tellin her bullshyt or she be beefin wit her friends, i be tryin to make her realize dat shyt affect me too on some real shyt. but she told me she aint like me tryin to force her to tell me shyt and tha shyt been smooth ever since.

[Collegeparkss]

bump, good subject

[GaMBiT]

agrees with vic..

will say tho, sometimes people do need space. some people do not involve others when they have problems. Especially if they had been like that before they met you. Its not easy to change habits.

I know it feel like, "why don't she talk to me", but if she need space give her space. my ladys like that.was kinda confusing at first, but she comes out of it communicates when she ready. tryin to force her to talk is just bad news. she may or may not change, but thats how she is. don't think she cheatin or nothin, but its how she is.

so, good luck in figuring out what its really about. maybe u get lucky and she just needed space like she said and it will all be good.


perfect advice ....going threw the EXACT same shit ...so i can relate ...listen to this right here ...

[nynemillimetre]

breaks in relationships aren't such good ideas.....paranoia will lead u two to act like jerks and assholes to each other!

[§hÄdY¤FîGuRê]

my ex used to do that all tha time .. it made me feel like i wasnt good enuff 4 her or someshit u kno .. u would think if u had a problem u would go to tha one who carez 4 u tha most .. but i guess not

[THC]

wanting to be alone doesn't mean anything sometimes its for the best, but saying i wanna see if i can live w/o you sounds like the relationship is doomed, sorry goodluck

[EmperorMACC]

The thing is that you seem to have known you gurl for some time now and it looks like you know she was like this from the get go. But for soem reason you maybe thought by now you would have 'loosen up'. I must say that this is be your time. Everyone is different whether yous see it as normal or not she has to do it her way. The you have to trust her to learn and grow towards to you more...IN HER TIME!